the weight of the world collects in oceans

november 2014

the weight of the world collects in oceans

oceans collect in wells of comfort, nurture, color

oceans collect in wombs and slight shoulders

they feed you and me (first through our mouths)

it is a disease when they pour their toxins

it is a disease when we accept those toxins

choking don't touch me, i can't breathe

strange fruit in the trees, in the streets

the weight of the world collects in oceans

your disease darkens and darkens and darkens

is this why white is the power? can you 

be cleaner when you darken the rest?

it is their fault they drink their lives away

it is their fault suicide is easier than speaking

about what "had to happen," what happens still

in the institutionalized intrusions of oceans

the weight of the world collects in oceans

collects in your knees when the marching gets difficult

when too many voices overpower the important ones

moves you to tears when you think of his children

yes, the weight of the world collects in oceans

our oceans bring us together, I love your slight shoulders

and all the things we can be for each other

and for all the colors and waters and animals

in the ass

I would give anything for this class to end

I would give anything to be able to sleep

or to give up on being "social"

or go "full throttle"

will I go to my friend's half birthday party? I don't know.

I really, really don't want to.

I would give anything to punch my professor in the face

and to set my email account on virtual fire

and cut this girl's hair off who's sitting in front of me

I would give anything to get away with being fucked up

I would give anything to go back and avoid

accumulating four ACES

-abandoned by parent

-family member with addiction

-family member with mental illness

-family member deceased

I would give anything to hide this

from my face and my posture and the way I talk

or don't talk

I would give anything for time

time to sleep for a month

cry for a month

hurt myself for a month

fuck for a month

write, holed up, with books, for a month

become a successful writer

forever

I would give anything to fuck historical trauma

and racism

and classism

and sexism

in the ASS